My review of Mountain Dew’s Kickstart, its new juice drink

My review of Mountain Dew’s Kickstart, its new juice drink

by Matt Peterson

                It is no secret that I am an avid fan of Mountain Dew.  I started my Dew appreciation in middle school, when I started just about every day off with a Code Red, Livewire, or classic Dew.  That was my routine through 3 years of middle school and 4 of high school.  I also would drink Dew while playing Halo or watching The Matrix with my friends.  At some point in high school, I was introduced to Taco Bell’s own Baja Blast and fell in love all over again.  Baja Blast, for those who are not familiar with it, looks and smells like a fizzy Windex, and it tastes just as good as you would imagine.  I still make special trips to Taco Bell just so I have an excuse to get my hands on this sweet nectar.  Around this same time I found Pitch Black, which finally filled the grape soda hole in my life which Mt. Dew hadn’t found a way to fill.

                Just as I was graduating high school, Mountain Dew released what I maintain was the best dew ever in their DEWmocracy campaign.  All three Dews this year were great.  I had a riot with Revolution, Voltage, and the gem of the bunch, Supernova.  Supernova reminded me why I started drinking Mountain Dew.  As a non-coffee drinker, I had to find another means of consuming caffeine.  Supernova was absolutely perfect at any time of day.  I often drank it right after brushing my teeth in the morning, with my lunch, or if I was staying up late.  It became a staple of my life in 2008.  It was smooth, flavorful, and unique.  It was the Swiss Army Knife of sodas; it fulfilled every requirement I have ever had for a beverage.  It became my drink.  I was ecstatic when it returned for a brief stint after I graduated from college.  It helped the transition into the real world by reminding me that I wasn’t changing into some final human form, but rather just taking on new responsibilities.  It kept me grounded.

                I dabbled around in Gamer Fuel, which I must admit, I love.  I don’t game hardcore, but the flavors are good and it feels like I can count on the flavors at least once a year.  Another round of DEWmocracy Dews came and went and I enjoyed the next three because of they brought a fresh Dew experience to what many would consider a seasoned Dew drinker.  The same went with the Dark Knight Dew edition.  I love new Dews because it is my chance to see how Mountain Dew wants to express its next movement.  When I saw that Mountain Dew was releasing a juice beverage, I couldn’t have been more excited.  Could this be what I have been waiting for?  Might I finally have a new breakfast Dew?  My thoughts raced and they soon became dreams of how my life may change with a breakfast juice/Mountain Dew hybrid to begin each day.  I was hyped and couldn’t wait to try this new Dew experience.

                February 25^th of 2013 rolled around and I began my search.  I didn’t go out of my way to find this drink, but I did keep two dollars of cash in my wallet on the off chance that was the only way I would be allowed to pay for it.  For almost two weeks I was on the lookout for the new breed of soda.  Today, March 8, 2013, I was buying popcorn for the machine at work and I found it!  It was sitting in the front of Walgreens, right in the corner on the way to the checkout line.  I had done it – these Dews were mine!    I happily strolled to the counter and paid for the cans of juice/soda.  Courtesy of some screwy rules in the FDA, this is technically a juice product.  That’s a whole other set of writings on how I feel about how Kickstart can be considered a juice product.

                Since they were stored in the corner of the store, the Kickstarts were very warm.  I threw them in the fridge and began to do some work.  It is surprisingly hard to concentrate on spreadsheets when salivating over the Pandora’s Box of Mountain Dew products, but I endured.  I knew the best experience would be had if the Dews were chilled, so I let them sit.  Finally, the afternoon slump came around and I had a great excuse to get up, walk around, and ingest some caffeine.  I headed straight to the refrigerator and grabbed the orange Kickstart.  I love orange juice and orange soda and the color orange, so this was an easy decision.  With a pull of the tab, the seal cracked and I was ready to enter soda nirvana. 

                As the first drops disappeared from my tongue, I was greeted with an unpleasant surprise.  I could tell immediately that this juice was sweetened with an artificial sweetener.  I took a peek at the nutrition facts and ingredients label and there was the proof.  Two different artificial sweeteners as well as some high fructose corn syrup.  I know many people cannot taste the difference in a food-thing which is artificially sweetened, but it turned me off right away.  I then discovered it was a low calorie drink.  What good is the gym membership if I’m drinking low calorie Mountain Dew?  It was a disaster.  I was completely let down.  This over-sweetened juice tasted pretty terrible, but I made myself drink further.  Perhaps I would grow accustomed to the flavors, or maybe my taste buds would get it together and figure out why Mountain Dew decided to release this product.

                Unfortunately, I only made it half way through the orange Kickstart before dumping it down the drain of the semi-public bathroom on our floor.  I was disheartened but I knew I still had one in the fridge.  And this flavor had been likened to Tahitian Treat – one of my all-time favorite sodas from my childhood.  Before I drowned my disappointment with the second Kickstart, I glanced at the label and was again disappointed; it had the same ingredients and calorie count as the first Dew.  This didn’t deter my efforts to enjoy the soda.  I cracked the top with the same enthusiasm (granted, with much more desperation) as I greeted the first.  It smelled amazing so I took my first swig.

                It was awful.  I understand why it was likened to Tahitian Treat.  The same basic flavor goal was approached by both beverages, but where Tahitian Treat does sweet, Kickstart did flat.  I took another sip in complete disbelief.  How could Mountain Dew have missed the mark by so much?  Did anyone taste these before they hit the market?  I had so many questions as I walked to the bathroom to quickly dispose of my most recent mistake.  I am not sure if it is grief or the quality of the drink, but the experience has left me queasy.  I always encourage everyone to experience something for themselves before making a decision, but I would like to make it known that I will never buy a Mountain Dew Kickstart again if they keep the same recipe.  It is the opposite of enjoyable to me.

                I am sorry to Mountain Dew for the possibly hard to hear remarks.  Fear not, I am not leaving the Mt. Dew family for good.  You dew too much good for me to turn my back on all of your products for one little mistake (see what I did there?!).  I hope this can be a learning experience for you – a chance to get better.  The idea was great – the execution was not on this one.  Thank you for the effort, but for now, I look forward to trying your next product.